ASIN: B00FXYL7LE
Publisher: Amazon.com Services LLC
Pages: 228
My dad had been found dead in his car. He'd taken a hose, stuck it in the tailpipe and then put the other end of the hose into his car. He climbed inside and let the car fill with fumes and then he died. Had this not been earth shattering enough, for it was only a couple decades after one single gunshot awoke the family, my grandmother Bessie, with my uncle, two aunts, and mom, the youngest at age 10, all sleeping upstairs, as the sound arose from the kitchen. It was five in the morning on a weekday in the year of 1954. He had used one of his hunting rifles. As a young girl, all I ever wanted was a loving family, as I was aching to belong to something or someone. Due my dad taking his own life, with the help of a garden hose and the family car, my reality came shattering down, allowing a fear of abandonment to rear its ugly head. Struggling to make sense of it all, I simply gave up ...
