John Raptor
Publisher: Amazon Digital Services LLC
Pages: 142

“How are you?” she asks. I stare at her for a long time. “I thought I killed you.”“Excuse me?”“I shot a flare into your mouth. Your head exploded. A chainsaw landed in your stomach. You’re dead.”“That’s funny. I don’t recall any of this at all.”“I killed you.”“Well, you obviously failed. I’m here, aren’t I?”“You’re evil,” I say. “Really? Amazing…and how does that make you feel?”“Scared.”She writes something on a notepad. “I suspect you have a phobia. Please continue.”“I have Peteaphobia. I’m scared of you. You and your basement.”“Please, no self-diagnosis.”“It’s your fault.”“Let’s not jump to conclusions. So where did this fear of basements begin?”“Um…when this evil girl named Pete tried to kill me with a chainsaw in her basement!” “And how did that make you feel?”“SCARED!”“And why do you ...
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